an apology is not simply about saying sorry
When I first arrived in this country, one of my first impressions, or culture shocks, was how often British people say sorry, even when they do not necessarily mean it. If you are coming out of the toilet and someone is trying to get in, you say sorry. If someone steps on your foot, you say sorry. These everyday apologies provide the starting point for Adam Lenson, the British Jewish theatre maker, in his new show, Is It Too Late Now to Say Sorry?
Lenson starts the show by introducing its elements, songs and stories, with one apology after another. He begins with a childhood memory of taking pleasure in eating the skin from his grandfather’s apple pie, before moving through the apologies he wishes he could have made at the time, to his friends, his family, his partner and one of his classmates. In between, he also talks about the apologies he thinks he deserved but never received. He compares himself to Justin Bieber and his infamous song “Sorry”, and compares Summerhall, where we are watching the show, to Coachella, where Bieber later performed the song. He also uses a puppet in the style of Sesame Street to teach us the 13 steps of making an apology.
The idea behind these 13 steps becomes clearer as Lenson talks about his anger and regrets, and his wish for a time machine that could allow him to correct his mistakes. He knows that he cannot go back, and that constantly returning to the past can prevent him from moving towards the future. This is what drives many of the apologies he wants to make. Sometimes what hurts the people who love you is not necessarily what you did, but what you said in anger. It takes a major change in his life for him to finally begin practising those 13 steps. I will not reveal what happens, but the change gives the show’s earlier stories about regret and apology a different weight.
That weight comes from Lenson’s discussion of the Jewish understanding of apology. Rather than focusing on receiving forgiveness, he explains, the emphasis is on what happens before that: changing your behaviour and making an effort to become a better person. In this sense, an apology is not simply about saying sorry. It is about taking responsibility for changing for good. This also gives a different meaning to the everyday “sorry” that opens the show. The polite word we use when someone steps into our way is easy to say. The apology Lenson asks us to consider requires something much harder.
LISTINGS INFORMATION
Venue: Summerhall
Dates: 6th-31st
Time: 12:15
Ticket prices: £18.5/concession £ 16
Fringe box office: 0131 226 0000 / www.edfringe.com
Age suitability: 14+ (Guideline)